Tuesday, 23 February 2010

MSM Tuesday 23/02/10

Welcome to a new, occasional series where Microdave brings us snippets of 'news' that have caught his eye and amused him, while he's been trawling around the interwebs . . . 

• Following on from an earlier story, one forum commenter said that, "Toyota should combine the Prius' faulty brakes and the Camry's jammed accelerators to create the Camrius: the most fuel-efficient death trap in automotive history."

• If you really want to know what a mobile phone does to your brain watch this:

• It could only happen in America:

DAYTONA BEACH, FL—Construction crews working to patch the rippled and broken asphalt of Daytona International Speedway reduced traffic to a single lane during last Sunday's Daytona 500, resulting in average speeds of 35 miles per hour. "It's bad enough that they can't get this fixed during the week," said race winner Jamie McMurray, who finished in just over 15 hours. "And NASCAR doubles the fines for speeding in work zones, so there was nothing we could do." Disagreeing with McMurray was Emilio Ramirez, operator of the No. 0563 Rolaids/Chick-fil-A Caterpillar road grader, who earned time-and-a-half for the race and called the event a "rousing success."

WASHINGTON—Following the launch of a Justice Department criminal probe into the CIA's alleged abuse of detainees, the intelligence agency was forced last week to complete months of previously scheduled torture over the course of one frenzied weekend. "We were already way behind on false executions as it was," said CIA director Leon Panetta, who was overseeing the consolidation of several human pyramids into one large one so that relentless tauntings and other dehumanizing practices could be accomplished more efficiently. "Only three of the car batteries have any juice left, and these poor dogs are almost too tired to strike. If we weren't keeping these guys awake 24-7, there's no way we'd be able to wrap this up by Sunday." Panetta said that if the CIA didn't finish in time, he will order a covert operative to assassinate Russian president Dmitry Medvedev to take some of the pressure off.

• And finally, for today, here is G.O.T training his pet parrot:



Ampers said...

In the early sixties I used to be a member of a South African owned club in Earls Court called The Overseas Visitors Club.

There was a parrot, called Max, in the basement bar and we taught it similar words of Anglo-Saxonry. One day the owner Nick, came into the bar with an old lady. She went up to the parrot and cood "Pretty Polly" who promptly told her: "Fuck off you stupid bitch". Nick quickly took her upstairs to the cocktail bar, and the next day the parrot disappeared.


Fidothedog said...

That parrot rocks.

banned said...

Microdave you really should be hosting your own blog, your input is always informative and/or amusing.

BTS said...

I was reminded of this story from a few years ago:


Barking Spider said...

The parrot's great!

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

G.O.T. you've done great work with that parrot.

Anonymous said...

@ Banned
Kinda reminds me of the time when The Eye and I had a word with a certain 'EBC' ;-)

Cheers but I think I need to cut back on the French and step up the anglo saxon a bit more ;-)

Amusing Bunni said...

Dave, this is a great post.
GOT you have trained that parrot very well ;-)