Showing posts with label fucked. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fucked. Show all posts

Sunday, 18 July 2010

Diane Abbott Is Fucked


With a friend like this, who the fuck needs enemies .....
"From what I can see she stands where I do on every issue and she is closer to the Labour traditions than any of her opponents. She would take the party in a leftward route, back to our roots in the working class communities and lead the fight back which is urgently needed. She would provide a new impetus; she is a charismatic intelligent fighter for Socialism, oh! and did I mention that she is black and that she is a woman? She and Labour have the chance here to make history let’s go for it."

You can read the rest of Diane Abbott's death nell here but for fuck's sake don't tell Brillo about it, he'd have a fucking field day ;-)


Incidentally, may I remind you of this sentence from a recent post:
He called a black woman a liar for talking about racism and then proceeded to ban all women from commenting on his blog .... on the grounds 'they were thick'.

Coincidence or just hypocricy?

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Thursday, 27 May 2010

Now That's What I Call A Mind Fuck





Wednesday, 12 May 2010

John Terry Injury ++Exclusive Photo++

England defender John Terry's participation in Saturday's FA Cup Final, and the World Cup, could be in jeopardy after the Chelsea captain suffered an injury to his right foot during training. Exclusive pic taken by a WAG who was watching at the time......

Ouch! That's going to sting a bit

.

Wednesday, 28 April 2010

Eeny Meeny Miny Moe



Nope.

Still fucking laughing like a demented hyena with a cannula in each foot
and a big fuck off tanker load of liquid nitrous oxide on tap.

Meanwhile..... talking of car crashes.......
The Labour candidate for Gravesham, Kathryn Smith,
has been arrested after being cut from her car and breathalysed

Bwaahahahahahahahahaha!

Gillian Duffy Only Popped Out For Some Bread





More from me later when I've finally stopped pissing
myself laughing at the moment the unelected fuckwit
finally showed his true colours and totally fucked himself
and the Labour Party just because a nice little old lady
popped out for some bread.......
.

Tuesday, 23 March 2010

WebCameron Shock Horror Probe

 Exclusive photo of Sam Cam conception,
via WebCumeron


Tip of the pelvis to Man Widdecombe

.

Tuesday, 9 February 2010

Toyota Recall Again

More excellent Toyota Recall fun. This selection has been sent in by some of the commentors from the original post here ;-)


from Simon

from JMT

from Microdave

.

Friday, 5 February 2010

Toyota Recall +++Update+++

Anyone remember that annoying slogan "the car in front is a Toyota"? Following the recall of millions of their vehicles worldwide, including the "can't stop now. I'm driving a Prius Penis", I thought we'd have a bit of sticker fun . . .







Anymore for anymore?

Meanwhile Peter Brookes has come up with a classic . . . 


+++UPDATE+++
Sent in  by MicroDave:
Plus an updated photo of the now infamous Fiat Panda ;-)


Sunday, 31 January 2010

England 2010 World Cup Song

Following the cock waving antics of the England Football Team Captain John Terry, Fabio Capello has finally settled on a suitable World Cup song for the upcoming FIFA tournament in South Africa. It's actually a slightly re-worded version of the original Frank Skinner, David Baddiel and Lightning Seeds classic . . .

He's cumming home
He's cumming home
He's cumming
Terry's on the bone
x4

Three lays on the shirt
Terry's knob still gleaming
30 Years of hurt
Never stoppped him creaming


The official England Team shirt manufactures Umbro, a subsidiary of Nike, have denied speculation that they will be including the famous slogan "Just Do It" on the new World Cup shirts. However, they have confirmed a re-design of the England Team shirt badge to reflect the lyrics of the new England World Cup song . . . .


Hat tip to The Lakelander
for the image and the inspiration


Other news from the world of sport:
Andy Murray has today confirmed that he is Scottish.
.

Friday, 27 November 2009

Cherie Blair Gets Fucked

Rik Mayall reprises his role as Alan B'stard MP in one of my all time favourite pieces of video mockery. Knowing Rik, as I do, just makes the whole fucking thing (pun intended) even funnier. If you have never seen this before you're in for a treat. A classic piece by Alison Jackson.


Thursday, 26 November 2009

Twatco Value

The Labour Press Office have confirmed that several additional products have now been added to their couldn't give a fuck what the fucking plebs think low value Twatco range. As a result, it appears that all the equivalent items that were previously available in the Great British Finest range, have now either been completely fucked to infinity and beyond irrevocably superceded or discontinued.







Saturday, 21 November 2009

What The Fuck. Literally.

"I have a huge grin on my face all the time, and it's not just because of the orgasms" says Michelle, the 300 orgasms a day woman who has finally found a man to satisfy her exhausting sexual requirements.

What the fuck, indeed!

Now I've heard some pretty varied excuses for work shy, lardy arsed chavs to avoid hard graft, whilst we pay for their Stella, fags and plasma TV's via the benefits system, but this one takes the fucking biscuit.

Literally.

This permanently vibrating piece of lard had to quit her job at the biscuit factory because the machines kept 'setting her off'. Lazy cunt. Actually that's wrong, it's just the rest of her that is.

This video interview is something else. Watch and weep . . . .



And what does Andrew the stallion do for a fucking living?
He's an industrial cleaner.

Fucking priceless!



Jacqui and Hazel discuss their new exercise bike.
Apparently it's called the Harriet Harmoniser

Tuesday, 17 November 2009

Afghan War. What's It For?







+++UPDATE+++
Read about the last blog entry
of the latest soldier to die in Afghanistan.

And weep.

Monday, 5 October 2009

David Blunkett Wedding Photo

Sarah Brown was a guest at Blunkett's wedding . . . .



  . . . and Gordon Brown came too!    



Feel free to add a caption of your own in the comments section;-)

Wednesday, 11 March 2009

Mandelson Blames The Treasury (Updated)


Fuck me it's getting contagious.
Isn't that what his bum chum Brownfinger normally does.
Blame every other fucker except himself?

Lord ManBottom of Man Muncher has apparently said that the much needed help for the British car industry (I use the term British loosely) is progressing far too slowly.

I, on the other hand, think that Lord ManBottom of ManMuncher is far to quick to behave like an egotistical twat who is far more interested in how he can readily line his pockets, and his rectum, rather than genuinely consider the welfare of this country as paramount.

Twat!

**Update**
Following a suggestion from The Eye, in the comments below, here is an alternative pic of Lord LickyBum . . . 

Tuesday, 13 January 2009

Seedy Gonzales


Fuck me sideways!
The Chavs would make a fortune doing this over here.  And there'd be a drink or two in it for them. No pizza though.

Apparently a 'Mexican entrepreneur', from California, decided to sell his 14 year old daughter. The guy even enlisted the services of a third party to broker the unusual 'wedding' deal.

The price?

$16,000, 160 cases of beer, 100 cases of soda, 50 cases of Gatorade (some kind of sports drink made by Quaker Oats - WTF!), two cases of wine and six cases of meat.

Unfortunately it all went a bit 'chilli' when the prospective 18 year old bridegroom, of the 14 year old girl, didn't live up to his end of the deal. So the father called the Police.

Oops. Our clever Mexican, in his haste to complain, must have forgotten that his daughter was 4 years under the legal age of consent in California. So it all kicked off.

The police subsequently discovered that the couple hadn't married but they had 'engaged in sexual relations'.  How politely put.

Stupid Yank twats!


Imagine if this had happened over here.
Fuck me. Nanny would have a stroke.

I don't expect social services would be bothered
to stretch out and reach though.

Bone idle twats!