Now That's What I Call A Mind Fuck

Killer Scum To Advise On Killer Scum

Note:This post is not by the G.O.T. TheEye has a non-sweary blog but needs to say this.

FuckingNotPleasedOffNess reigns.

Have you seen this?

TheOne, The Obamessiah, The Chosen One is going to "Ask Sinn Fein leader Martin McGuinness what lesson the Northern Ireland conflict holds for Middle East and Iraq."

Answer: Try to stop murdering teenage soldiers who probably haven't lost their virginity yet and not shooting fucking taxi drivers and random blokes in fucking pubs. Clue? Eh?

I'll take my consultancy fee on my way out.

Right, I am going to fisk this article:

"The White House meeting is part of a series of events marking St Patrick's Day and comes amid continued controversy over Sinn Fein's reaction to the recent murder of two British soldiers and a police officer by extreme republican groups."

Okay: 'controversy' is a bit pisspoor but 'murder' we'll run with.

"Martin McGuinness, first deputy minister, has been criticised for merely claiming that the deaths 'betrayed the political desires' of the Irish people. Gerry Adams, the president of Sinn Fein, has called the killings 'wrong' but initially blamed army tactics for provoking the IRA splinter organizations that carried out the attacks."

Yeah, a couple of body bags...just a small reminder of the good old days eh, cuntstains? 'Wrong'? In a sort of people-dead wrong thingy? Just a sodding bit, son. And 'provoking'? Our army has collectively bent over and taken it up the brown starfish for your type and still we can't even send out for a pizza without getting acute lead poisoning.

Ah but to place the huge steaming turd directly on top of your neighbour's nice rockery feature:
"The consultation will continue the trend of Northern Irish leaders exporting their expertise in conflict resolution."

So, conflict resolution in the place where they are still killing each other then. Let's see where these taxpayer junkets are taking them.

"Mr McGuinness has visited Iraq and Sri Lanka, while Gerry Adams, the Sinn Fein president, has worked with the Spanish on Basque separatism."

Iraq? They still bomb you. Sri Lanka. Yep, still bombing. The Basque region...take a cunting guess. No cigar, motherfucker.

"Gerry Kelly, a convicted IRA bomber and Sinn Fein official, has just returned from the Philippines with Jonathan Powell, Tony Blair's former chief of staff, where they advised the government on a long-running insurgency in the south."

No mention of the IRA bastards who went to Columbia to train FARC terrorists there how to...go on, you know you want to guess...blow people up.

Insurgency, Phillipines? Uh, yes, still bombing again. Not very good, are they? And what's with this Bliar's spinmeister being involved too? Aren't they all supposed to be sorting out terrorism in the Middle east, which is what Blair and Obama are trying to....oh fuck off the lot of you.

TheEye has nothing left to say.

Tinsel Is Dangerous - It's Official

It's comforting to know that as Christmas approaches we can try and forget how much our pathetic government is ruining our lives by putting up a few cheery decorations.

But no, hold on a fucking minute, some wanker of a jobsworth at Scrooge Council HQ has decided that tinsel is dangerous!

A school lollipop man has been told to remove the tinsel from his lollipop because it may distract drivers and put children in danger. Apparently he was 'reported' to the Council by an anonymous passer-by, who had nothing better to do, the sad twat.

Answer me this, you tossers. How can a piece of tinsel be more distracting than some bloke dressed in bright yellow clothing holding a great big fucking lollipop.

Wake up smell the coffee, get a fucking life and stop wasting Council Tax payers money on small minded bollocks.

Twats!