The Must Have Christmas Toy For KIds This Year

Well, when I say 'must have', I mean that your kids 'must have' a penchant for a board game that includes a plastic dachshund which produces fluorescent yellow shit, every time they squeeze the pump action handle. What the fuck! And who says that Germans don't have a sense of humour.

And the name of this game?

Kackel Dackel. I shit you not.

Goliath Games have got previous when it comes to producing kids' games that include an unsavoury discharge .... this is one of theirs too!

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Obama Unveils Presidential Poodle

Bollock Obummer officially announced the adoption of his new presidential poodle shortly after the recent G20 summit. Nicknamed 'Shitter', it is a rare Scottish Shitzyu breed which are renowned for being experts at burying things.

Although not fully house trained the Obummers are hoping that 'Shitter' will soon stop pissing everywhere once he gets used to the training pads. His other habit, of using his arse to smear shit on to anyone that upsets him, is thought to be due to some type of arrogant mental health problem coupled with a tendency to bark up the wrong tree.

Obummer says that he has consulted a British Lord about 'Shitter's' dirty habit and he advises him that a butt plug should cure this.

Although 'Shitter' only has one-eye, is grossly overweight due to his penchant for fois gras and also has anger management problems they are also hoping to employ an animal physcotherapist called O'Dollie D'Raper to assist with his all around well being.

Laurel & Hardy

Saw this photo of Laurel and Hardy

and thought it would be ideal for a caption competition.

Add your own pithy and offensive captions

via the comments link below.

I'll start you off with:

"For fucks sake darling, some of your bullshit has just flown into my eye!"