The Budget Song

It's amazing how you can still try to be smart,
Thanks to you our economy's fallen apart,
This Budget Day you have done it again,
Talked a lot but you don't say a thing,

CHORUS:
You're all a disgrace, and you've mortgaged the country,
All your figures are lies, and you've wasted our money,
In thirteen long years you've delivered precisely sod-all,
We've masses of debt,
and you've done nothing at all.

Courtesy of Dungeekin
who has the rest of the revised lyrics here ;-)


Many thanks to all those that took part in the Budget Live Blog. Hope you all enjoyed it and any feedback you have would be welcome in the comments here ;-)
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Budget 2010 ++Live Chat++

Darling's Vote Winning Budget ++Updated++

Yeah right.
More like Bully Boy Brown's desperate attempt to try and buy a few more votes without giving a flying fuck for the long term future of this Country.

The only good thing about today?
It REALLY is Darling's last budget.

So, good fucking riddance, you bushy eye browed, fiscal fucking bastard. You shot in the dark, clutching at straws, Chancer of the BouncedChequer from the Twattery. You baffoon of an unelected Gordoom Brownfinger's mouthpiece.

Fuck off and fill the expense fiddling, sleaze ridden black hole of a fucked-in-the-arse British economy, from the tax-payer-cash laden bank accounts that all you fucking arsewipes at NuLabore have got.

And keep your fucking tax hungry mitts off the red wine. . . .

Don't forget to come and have your say.....
Live chat during the Budget,
here at 12.15pm


+++UPDATE+++
Following a request from Uncle Marvo, in the comments,
Lorenzo has been busy with the photoshop ;-)

The Budget 2010 Live Blog

On Wednesday afternoon at 12:30pm here on GrumpyOldTwat we will be live blogging the last Budget before the General Election. The Budget will be carried on all major UK television channels except for BBC1 which will be showing Bargain Hunt (I shit you not!).

Pound to a pinch of snot that the Chancellor’s speech will be a blatant attempt to gain more of those brain dead Labour voters, so we can expect plenty of unaffordable bollocks, deferred until after the Election, in the hope that the Conservatives are left well and truly in the shite.

So why not come and join in the Budget Live Blog which, apart from the opportunity to have your say, promises to be great fun as 10, yes 10 blogs will all be hosting it simultaneously.

This 'chat' collaboration will be between A Tangled Web, All Seeing Eye, Barking Spider, Biased-BBC, Corrugated Soundbite, Dick Puddlecote, Governmentitus, GrumpyOldTwat, Man Widdecombe, and Subrosa - all excellent and highly recommended blogs. If you haven't been to some of them before then please take this chance to try them out.

To catch the live blogging, come back here on Wednesday, March 24th just after noon.

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Darling, You're A Cunt

The Chancer of the Exchequer is nothing but a thieving cunt. He's creamed thousands off the hard working taxpayer whilst 'flipping' his fucking houses like a demented coin tosser.

But, oh, hang on everything is just fucking dandy. The cash trousering cunt bubble has decided to pay back £700.

£700? Is that all?

Is that fucking all that you're paying back Darling?

700 fucking measly pounds.

Fuck off you arsewipe!

Personally I wouldn't be happy if you paid back millions.

You have stolen from us.

You are untrustworthy.

You have no morals.

You are a crook.

You are a thieving cunt.

We don't want our money back from you, we'd rather see you swing by your bollocks from the nearest tree whilst we piss in your face and you choke on our shit.

That, you cunt, is all!

Darling You're Taking The Piss

It just keeps getting worse.

There are two problems here. . . 

1) Under HM Revenue and Customs rules, you are not allowed to claim the cost of employing an accountant to fill in a self-assessment tax form as a legitimate business expense. Incidentally, he's not the only one at it of course.

2) If the Chancellor of the Exchequer fiscal fucking fucktard can't even sort out his own tax affairs, where the fuck does that leave us with regard to this Countrys dire, debt ridden economy.

Thieving twat!

Even more fiscal fucking nonsense is available here and here.

You Need Help Darling

Not content with already having gambled away our grandchildrens' inheritance, and their grandchildren's too, Gordoom the Goofer's fiscal fucking mouthpiece has just thrown another staggering £175 BILLION onto the roulette table.

And that's just for now.

Get help you total twatting twat.

Fuck the fuck off and take that unelected fucktard, with his hand up your arse, with you!

Should Have Gone To Specsavers Darling

And keep your fucking tax hungry mitts off the red wine.

You bushy eye browed, fiscal fucking bastard. You shot in the dark, clutching at straws, Chancer of the BouncedChequer from the Twattery. You baffoon of an unelected Gordoom Brownfinger's mouthpiece.

Fuck off and fill the expense fiddling, sleaze ridden black hole of a fucked-in-the-arse British economy, from the tax-payer-cash laden bank accounts that all you fucking arsewipes at NuLabore have got.

Twats!

Move Over Darling

I Just Haven't Got A Clue What To Do

**Update**

Here are the revised lyrics, courtesy of Conan the Librarian . . . . 

Aah, aah 

You better beware, you better take care
You better watch out if you've got long black hair
He'll come from behind, you go out of your mind
You'd better not go, you'd never know what you'll find

Aah, aah
You look in his eyes, don't be surprised
If you don't know what's going on behind his disguise
Nobody knows where Darling goes
He'll steal your money out from under your nose

Does anyone know the way, did we hear someone say
We just haven't got a clue what to do
Does anyone know the way, there's got to be a way
To Block Buster!

The cops are out, they're running about
Don't know if they'll ever be able to Block Buster out
He's gotta be caught, he's gotta be taught
'Cos he's more evil than anyone here ever thought

Does anyone know the way did we hear someone say
We just haven't got a clue - ow!
Does anyone know the way, there's got to be a way
To Block Buster!

Does anyone know the way did we hear someone say
We just haven't got a clue what to do
Does anyone know the way, there's got to be a way
To Block Buster!

Aah, aah, aah, aah
Buster, Buster, to Block Buster!
Buster, Buster, to Block Buster!
Buster, Buster, to Block Buster!...

Laurel & Hardy

Saw this photo of Laurel and Hardy

and thought it would be ideal for a caption competition.

Add your own pithy and offensive captions

via the comments link below.

I'll start you off with:

"For fucks sake darling, some of your bullshit has just flown into my eye!"