Swine Flu Information

What is swine flu?

Swine flu is a troughing disease that infects NuLabore pigs and is caused by a corrupt virus. There are regular outbreaks of swine flu in NuLabore pigs, who become mentally ill but rarely die from the virus itself. Swine flu does not normally infect civil servants although this does occasionally happen when they have had close contact with NuLabore pigs.

There is evidence that swine flu is spreading from Minister to Minister, which could lead to what is called a 'pianodemic flu outbreak'. Pianodemic flu is different from ordinary flu because it is a new strain of the virus that pisses off the taxpaye, so much so, that they eventually string up NuLabore pigs with piano wire, from the nearest lampost.

The symptoms

Typical signs that a troughing NuLabore pig has been infected by swine flu will usually include all of the following  :

Possession  of a 2nd or 3rd pigsty

Sow/boar and 1 or more piglets employed to do nothing

Weight gain from trough snouting

Smearing shit on innocent victims

Delusions of grandeur and rampant arrogance

Repeatedly pissing tax payers money up the wall

Subscription to Totalitarian Monthly magazine

Who is a risk?

Anyone that works for the bog eyed, mucus munching, turd burglaring, amoeba brained, KFC gut bucketing twat that has fucked this Country so hard in the arse that we'll need to wrap it in duck tape to stop it splitting.

So remember, if you are a good hard working taxpayer you will not die from swine flu but troughing NuLabore pigs infected with the corrupt virus are staring a pianodemic in the face.