Monday 12 October 2009

Jacqui Smith, Don't Forget the Porno

Third and final part of 
"Jacqui Smith is a piss taking porno provider" night, on G.O.T. . . 

Jacqui says: "I want to apologise unreservedly to the House - as I have to my constituents - for wrongly claiming for the cost of films alongside my broadband and cable connection".

I say:"What about the other £160,000 of taxpayers' hard earned that you've had your grubby, fat, lard stained fingers on" and "You seem to have left out the word porno when you mention THOSE films"

In a way though, I can't blame Flick Wrist Dickie for choosing to perform a five fingered shuffle on his festered ferret. Who the fuck in their right mind would want to play a ditty on the JS furry banjo? Christ, you'd have to spray the fat bitch in oil and throw a bag of flour at her before you'd find it anyway!

Just don't expect us to fucking pay for that as well.

What's that you say? "I'll pay the money back".  Fuck the fucking fuck off, you bullshitting, ball bag pimping, sleaze bag . . .





Jacqui and Hazel discuss their new exercise bike.
Apparently it's called the Harriet Harmoniser




9 comments:

The End (Bye Bye!) said...

A wonderful rant, and more great images.

A terrific night of entertainment on Grumpy Old Twat.

I couldn't beat the "Rancid Rasher", so I just posted that at my place ;-)

Anonymous said...

Cheers Gigs, I even had a laugh or two myself at some of the old stuff. Not bad considering that Miss Duplicitous 2009 has run off with OUR fucking money and got nothing more than a slap on the twatting wrist.

Hey ho, that's New Labour for you, eh.

Enjoy your bacon sarnie mate ;-)

Road_Hog said...

I don't know how Richard Timney could order a wanking video, are big tits and a stern manner (school mistress) not enough to get him a hard on?

Snarky Basterd said...

I told Fido I've actually missed the days when you and he and others were hammering this cunt every day.

banned said...

Unemployable porky cunt should be left out for the chavs who could sell her remains to the Pikeys once they've done with her.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Excellent pic of Smith. I'm going to nick that for future use!

Lauren Simcock said...

Her middle name is JILL.Even her PARENTS thought she was a cunt-in-waiting.The cunt

Jacqui Jill went up the hill,
To pile on her expenses...

GOT,you are far cleverer than me at your witty retorts.I'm sure you can finish this one off...

Anonymous said...

Thanks GOT - a good laugh at this, even though as a whole, it isn't funny at all.

banned said...

From 'Andrew' A Commenter at the Daily Telegraph.

"Jaqui Smith’s greatest value to the government would be as a Dante-esque gargoyle, terrifying ministers into decent, honest behaviour.

Then again, she sat all that time in cabinet without affecting the prime minsiter. Maybe she sat on his blind side."