I really do have more than the necessary qualifications listed, having worked as a senior creative for one of the largest design, print and publishing companies in Europe and I'd love to see the look on their faces, when they ask if I also have an interest in politics.
"Well .... yes I do actually. In fact I have my own little blog which flirts with the in and outs of the political world, from time to time. You may even be familiar with it, having appeared in your very own 2009 Top Political Blog listings and it's also currently ranked in the Wikio Top 40. In fact, your boss has had the odd mention or two ... if I recall correctly."
Go on, go on!
"I'm the Grumpy Old Twat!"
NEXT!
You'd be great at the job, Gotty.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I wonder how long it would be before you quietly sneaked in the words "IAIN DALE IS A CUNT" into an otherwise innocent picture... ;)
Its not like they want a lot from the appointee GOT, you could do it standing on your head! Don't tell em about this blog and if you get in then make plenty of use of Drop Caps, see how many editions you can get out for our amusement!!!
ReplyDeleteOh Dear:
ReplyDelete"When they state: "Must have a strong interest in British Politics", somehow, coming from the Guardian adds, I do get the feeling that you'd be disqualified...
Just a wild stab in the dark mind you, so, are you willing to wear a burka if required, and fast for Ramadan every year?
No?
Sorry........Your not qualified to do the fucking job at all then!
Just saying.....
Cheers Grim!
ReplyDeleteDo you mean something like this ;)
Ah yes Indy, you're probably refering to something along these lines ;)
ReplyDeleteFair points made there Dazed and the other problem is that I'm frigtheningly heterosexual ..... which would also be a handicap. Probably ;)
ReplyDeleteDo I need to go to SpecSavers again? - I can't see anything offensive in that picture. Did you post the wrong one, or am I terminally stupid?
ReplyDeleteAs for the job application, make sure you can fall back on your current employment, as Fatty Pickles is intending to put all Public Sector jobs online, which should finish the Grauniad of pretty smartly!
It's all very subtle MD. As Grim eluded to, any picture can look innocent but sometimes the title of the image can be anything but.
ReplyDeleteIt's a practice that I have employed many times in the past ;)
There is room for queers, here's something I prepared earlier...
ReplyDeletehttp://ampers.wordpress.com/2010/06/04/war-famine-and-homosexuality/
Well, sort of. But you wouldn't be able to use that trick on the print edition, sadly.
ReplyDeleteI suggest getting a sign saying something like "DANGEROUS CURRENT" and getting Dale to stand in fron of the sign. Roughly in front of the letters "RRE" if you catch my drift.
There's a whole day's blogging in that. And the beauty of it is it would work with just about any blogger, whether you loved them or hate them.
Ta for the link Ampers, an interesting angle and well worth a read.
ReplyDeletebtw, I always call them 'gayers', if that helps at all ;)
What a great idea for a competition!
ReplyDeleteAh yes, but Macs are trendy and have snob value, in those sort of circles dontcha know. Image is everything to the likes of them and people like the fat poof. Although I can never see them (or him) actually openly admitting to it.
ReplyDeleteSeems to me that the salary is shite?
ReplyDeleteMeaningless job spec?
Is that MAC running Windows?
"<span>Seems to me that the salary is shite? "</span>
ReplyDeleteYou wouldn't think he'd be quite so tight arsed, would you ;)
What have I started?
ReplyDeleteI bet I'll find out in a few hours... ;)
"<span>Image is everything to the likes of them and people like the fat poof."</span>
ReplyDeleteUntil you show them something like this:
Well I can kick things off with a pic from a Diane Abbott Fail post, that I did a while back. Rather tame, I know, but no less amusing .....
ReplyDeleteBrilliant! Love it ;)
ReplyDelete<span>"I'm frigtheningly heterosexual", no pride, then?</span>
ReplyDeleteYou've definitely got to apply Gotty ..
ReplyDeleteIt would be the ultimate in "wind-ups" .. besides, it would be churlish not to ..
Hee hee ... :-D :-D
Go for it Gotty.
ReplyDeleteI'll provide a reference, if one's wanted. I've plenty of headed paper from previous blue-chip employers.
At your age you could apply under a pseudonym pretending to be a female, coloured, disabled hetero-sexual. That'd help Mr Dale achieve his Diversity Target.
Superb Ampers, rational and enlightened. Hope that doesn't offend you.
ReplyDeleteIt'll be fun thinking about the HR dept trying to work out which of the applicants is G.O.T. ... What I'd give to be a fly on the wall!
ReplyDeleteCheers Joe, I'll let you know!
ReplyDelete"<span>pretending to be a female, coloured, disabled hetero-sexual"</span>
What, like Flabbott with a limp you mean ;)
A senior creative for one of the largest design, print and publishing companies in Europe and you're not a Gayer!!
ReplyDeleteHmm. From the ad:
ReplyDelete"<span>Do you want to take charge of the design of a successful national monthly political magazine?"</span>
Yup. If they'd kindly let us know when such a magazine exists and we'll all be right on it. Just not "right on" ;)
Hard to believe I know, Spackers but that was in the day when men were men and gayers stayed in the closet.
ReplyDeleteLoL ;)
ReplyDelete"<span>"<span>Do you want to take charge of the design of a successful national monthly political magazine?"</span> </span>
No, but I'd like to have some sport while you Westminster Bubble wankstains try and work out which one of your canididates is that cunt, the Grumpy Old Twat.
Bwaahahahahahahaha :-D :-D