Looks like the Blog Poll season has kicked off in earnest then. So far we appear to have the annual fat poof Right Wing Love-in Poll, the twisted Lefty socio-militant Worst UK Political Blog Poll and the seemingly pointless Biggest Liars in British Blogging Poll from Buggerheads. I mean, aren't we all a little economical with the truth, from time to time.
I have decided there is a gap in the market.
Twats!
There's shit loads of the fuckwitterers, out there in blogosphere land. Left wing, right wing, Libertarian, Coalition, Tofu eaters, MSM journos, MP's, MEP's, BNP, UAF, Commies, tree huggers, warmists, Muslim fanatics, tin foil hat wearers, deluded dickwads, etc., etc., ... the list is endless.
There's a twat in every in every port!
So here is your chance to vote for who you consider to be the biggest twat in the British blogosphere, bar fucking none.
I like simple rules, so here they are:
1. Vote for as few blogging twats as you want up to a maximum of ten.
2. Twattish twittering micro blogging twats are also allowed
3. Votes must be ranked in order of twattishness. Worst first.
4.Votes can be left in the comments here, for all to see, or, if you prefer, you can use this dedicated email address : blogtwatspoll@gmail.com
5. No Anonymongs, no repeats. Poll closes midnight Friday 6th August 2010.
If you have your own blog and want to encourage your readers to nominate a few Blog Twats, so much the better. Here's the HTML code you need to add the above graphic to your posts or sidebars which will automatically send them to this instruction page, when clicked ....
<a href="http://grumpyoldtwat.blogspot.com/2010/07/blog-poll-awards-2010.html"><img src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/_yc-Lk62n49w/TEAR9ukA8jI/AAAAAAAAFFE/dvyY2IgTtr0/s800/Blog%20Twats%20Poll.jpg" style="border: 0;" alt="Click here to vote in the Blog Twats Poll 2010" /></a>
If you want to tell your readers who you voted for, that's fine, I couldn't give a shit. It's still a free country and you're entitled to share your opinion with anyone that'll listen.
The results will not be appearing in any magazine or book and will not be announced during a newspaper review on Sky News or some backwater Radio station or other.
The Top 20 Twats of British Blogging will be published here sometime after the Poll closes and when I'm good and fucking ready. So .... spread the word and get voting but, above all else, have fun.
blogtwatspoll@gmail.com
Heh!!
ReplyDeleteI like very much. Unless I'm voted for, of course!
"I have decided there is a gap in the market.
ReplyDeleteTwats!"
Was going to suggest www.fattwats.com...
... but some twat has beat me to it:
http://whois.domaintools.com/fattwats.com 8-)
Speaking of twats...
ReplyDeleteDo you still have a link to the Lord Of The Chocolate Rings Mandelson piss take, (you did last year was it?), G.O.T.?
Could do with a laugh. Thanks.
One gets the impression from reading Dunderheads, sorry I mean Bloggerheads, that its author, Saint Timothy of Ireland has never told a lie or an untruth in his life. I take it he would pursue himself as aggressively as he does to everyone else whenever they tell something that isn't the full truth. I bet he wouldn't. No wonder he gets called Lassie by Dizzy. Australia can have him back, the miserable little cunt.
ReplyDeleteHe's definitely the biggest twat on the blogosphere today. I shall have to think about the top 10, however. There's quite a large list to whittle down.
For some reason, I feel like nominating Lassie over at ...Is A Cunt again now. Can't think why...
I'm sure there are plenty enough twats out there before they get to you Rab ;)
ReplyDeleteNo worries.
ReplyDeleteVoting for any type of twat blogger (or 'Twogger') will do, just as long as they are a twat .... in your opinion ;)
Not sure which post you are after but everything is still here. Check out the list of 'Labels' in the right sidebar, click on the ones you want and all posts covering that label will appear.
ReplyDeleteI guess you need 'manmuncher' or 'peter mandelson' ;)
That's the spirit Grim!
ReplyDeleteAnd I can't say I disagree with any of it ;)
It's no good I can't resist it...The Fat Poof is my choice...especially as he's in Crete at the moment.
ReplyDeletePS....have the logo on my blog in accordance with your wishes O Master....pmsl
ReplyDeleteBelay my last choice...it has to be Tom Harris. Twat of the millenium.
ReplyDeleteThanks Cato, and don't panic!
ReplyDeleteYou can have up to ten nominations and all you need to do is put them in order of first worst.
I'll count Harris first, Dale second then?
Only the FP'er or a leftie qualify!"
ReplyDeleteEveryone qualifies. You decide who. Simples.
ReplyDeleteForget the politics, just pick any 10 twats ;)
Okay, I'm back. This was bloody hard to whittle down to just ten - I've had to let go of some really monotonous, cockwaffling blogging twats to get to this stage, but here goes...
ReplyDelete1. Bloggerheads. This has to be the most dreary, self-obsessed, boring blog on the Internet, run by... well, the most dreary, self-obsessed boring man on the Internet. Constantly boasts about the fact he's been a blogger since 2001. Has he been a twat for all that time?
2. Alastair Campbell's Blog. What a fuckwit this man is. Apart from his history of cuntishness, he can't even get a proper bloody design on his blog. A blog should look similar in format to say, this blog.
3. Liberal Conspiracy. Sunny Hundal - another dreary, self-obsessed, boring twat. For his hypocrisy and ability to write hundreds of words of drivel a minute, he was rated very highly by the Reaper's Judges. Does not make it to Number 1 on the grounds he does occasionally say something vaguely interesting.
4. Kerry McCarthy MP's blog - Shot By All Sides. The Twitter Twat, as Gotty calls her. Need I say more?
5. Guido Fawkes Blog. I really can't stand the man anymore. Ever since Guido broke the story last year about Damian McBride, he's become this utterly smug git who, frankly, has nothing to be smug about.
6. Boatang & Demetriou. Boring & Demented as they're better known in the blogosphere, they're a pair of absolute twats. I wish that troll who was on Obo's site would set up his own parody blog. Plus these two seem to have started swear-blogging now, something the likes of DK and Obo always do far better. Visitor numbers in freefall?
7. Cuntcillor Terry Kelly. See the GrumpyOldTwat blog earlier this week for my reasons on this prick.
8. Tom Harris MP's blog - And Another Thing. DK called him "a smug cunt who deserves to be beaten like a fucking pinata". Add twat onto that list.
9. Iain Dale's Diary. I used to rather like Dale when I first started reading his blog. Now he just spends half his time telling you about his next media appearance, the next big shot he's interviewing for Total Bolitics or even worse, promoting whatever book his company has just published. He really needs to get back to basics, that man. And by that, I don't mean have several affairs.
10. Ellie Gellard's Twatter feed. A prolific Twatter user and a prolific twat, evidence of which is shown is almost every Tweet she makes. Plus is supporting Ed Balls in the Labour leadership campaign. Admittedly, I am too, but because I think he'll destroy Labour forever. She doesn't think that - pillock.
I like the way you've spread your twat votes right across the political spectrum. A twat is a twat regardless of what or who they stand for.
ReplyDeleteVery well, here's my take on the twattiest UK blogs.
ReplyDelete1. Speak You're Branes. (Off the scale twattery; all contributors to this site are badly in need of a face slap for being smug left-wing-by-default student mongtards. No, your PhD doesn't make you smart, it makes you a twat.)
2. Guido. (Cesspit.)
3. Alastair Campbell. (Obvious reasons.)
4. Liberal Conspiracy. (Every article a solid gold nugget of po-faced self-righteousness.)
5. Comment Is Free. (It's basically Liberal Conspiracy with the laughable pretension of being unbiased.)
6. Old Holborn. (A libertarian as imagined by The Daily Mail.)
7. Stephen Fry's Twitter feed. ("Socialism's all very well in practice, but does it work in theory?")
8. Nick Robinson's Newslog. (Reaching almost Stephen Fry levels of twattery.)
9. Kerry McCarthy. (Obvious reasons.)
10. The real Ron Broxted. (The fake one is ace.)
Guido Fawkes, it's all a bit shit now isn't it.
ReplyDeleteIain Dale is so far up his own arse there is no room for a cock.
I'm a firm believer that anyone can be a twat, no matter what their political views. Although I certainly don't agree with this Leftish twaddle that twats are all equal.
ReplyDeleteGreat fun, GoT and my first suggestion is anything with Sunny Hundal's name on it.
ReplyDeleteBlack or white, rich or poor, educated or not, left or right - anyone can be a twat!
ReplyDelete<span>1) Richard Murphy
ReplyDelete2) Richard Murphy
3) Richard Murphy
4) Richard Murphy
5) Richard Murphy
6) Richard Murphy
7) Richard Murphy
8) Richard Murphy
9) Richard Murphy
10) Richard Murphy</span>
Stolen from @AngryTeen
1) Tim Ireland, of Bloggerheads.
ReplyDelete2) Guido. He gets good scoops at times, but.. he's just a twat.
3) Richard Murphy, the big government, anti free speech "libertarian"
4) Iain Dale
5) Al Jahom
1. Obnoxio the Clown
ReplyDeleteThat'll be a repeat vote but no worries ..... the top one will count ;)
ReplyDeleteWell, that didn't take long ...... I said NO Anonymong voters (or guest as this damned Echo would have it). Just make up a name, any name, anything to keep a Grumpy Old Twat happy, eh ;)
ReplyDeleteIn the meantime, will someone else pick up that vote .... hate to see a good twat go to waste ;)
Alright, alright,
ReplyDelete6) Obo.
1) @BevaniteEllie - a cracked vuvuzela.
ReplyDelete2) Liberal Conspiracy - turns out there ARE drugs I've never tried.
3) Tom Harris - used to be interesting. Then came opposition & reversion to hilariously un-self-aware cries of "It's not faaaaaaaaiiirrr!!".
4) Hanging Bitch (http://www.hangbitching.com/) - Comedy band-wagon jumping lefty whinger.
5) Obo The Clown - I mean, really!
6) Oleuanna - Token effort. Go Boers!
7) http://www.taxresearch.org.uk - Really very peculiar indeed.
8) Rantin Rab - YouTube Posting Bellend.
9) Constantly Furious. Fucking quitter.
10) Iain Dale - Gotta have a gayer in the list, eh?
1)Bloggerheads, sheer self righteous, self pitying leftis twaddle
ReplyDelete2) Tom Harris, used to be good reading, until recently when he came over all authoritarian.
3) Terry Kelly, dear, oh dear oh dear.
4) Old Holborn, often very very good, but his views on Israel make him a total and utter twat.
5) Obo, because he is.
6) The Monarchist (http://themonarchist.blogspot.com/) sycophantery gone orbital.
7) Bevanite Ellie, this girl should really get a life.
8) Kerry McCarthy, ban me will you? twat.
9) Boatang and Demetriou, would have been higher, but they're trying too hard these days.
10) Tory Bear, occasional defender of the indefencible.
Hi Gotty! I put the cool pic with the code right at my top right side.
ReplyDeleteI will have to compile my list of 10 fully later, but I'll give you my top 5 now. ;)
1. <span>Cuntcillor Terry Kelly</span>
2. Andrew Twatward, Psycho 007 mental case
3.<span> Kerry McCarthy</span>
4. That common purpose bitch and or common purpose website
5. Obo the clown.....(i just don't get him)
1,Iain Dale fat tory prick!
ReplyDelete2,Terry Kelly.
3,The stilettoed socialist,you know the one the posh tart who is friends with Blairs son, and got put into the safe Liebore seat up somewhere near Liverpool.
4,I got bored with Guido a long time ago.
Iain Dale..1-100
ReplyDeleteOne total jerkoff
he is ,to the Blogosphere what Judas Iscarriot was to the Last Supper
Liberal Vision 101-200
I'de rather do a Lambada with Medusa
Schmuck Finder General
Apologies. For some reason that post didn't format as usual...
ReplyDeleteDescisions...descisions....
ReplyDeleteHave a think I will
1. Iain Dale
2.The Mc Carthy bitch, vote fixing apologist!
3....ooooooo...let ya know laterz....
will post the thingy now!
;)
ReplyDeleteNo worries. The twat votes have come through loud and clear ;)
ReplyDeleteGreat pics to go with the votes .... nice touch ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd how could I forget.....
ReplyDelete9) Toilets Maguire - Labour bitchboy, co-conspiritor of Dolly Draper, Charlie Whelan and Damien McBride and Far-Left twat extraordinaire. Oh, and he's a Twatterer, too!
can't be arsed.
ReplyDeletebut you get my vote for the twattyest commenting software.
Can't say I disagree with a single vote, almost.
ReplyDeleteYours
Fence sitting twat.
So I guess you won't be too fucking happy when the paywall goes up and it'll cost you 99p to post a comment ;)
ReplyDelete"<span>Fence sitting twat"</span>
ReplyDeleteIs that a vote for one of the LibDem bloggers, Bob? ;)
Our comment thingy is the BEST out there :-D
ReplyDelete1) Guido Fawkes
ReplyDelete2) Jeff at SNP Tactical Voting
Easily
ReplyDeleteCouncillor Kelly
"
" ad infinitum and ad nauseum
Aye, Tory Bear does seem to have his moments of twattishness these days, sadly. Appearing on the BBC News Channel a couple of times seems to have gone to his head.
ReplyDeleteLiberal Twatspiracy, Pickled Bolitics, that sort of stuff?
ReplyDeleteI'd have voted for John "Squawk" Demetriou, the one that occasionally hangs around Obnoxio The Clown's place if he had his own blog.
ReplyDeleteHaving thought long and hard...well, about 30 seconds, here's my choice of Twats
ReplyDelete1. Supreme Twat...Tom Harris
2. Dale
3.Kerry McCarthy
4.Her crony..BevaniteEllie
5.Tim Ireland
6.Terry Kelly
7.Toilets
8.Campbell
9. Tory Bear
10..Sadly...Obo..not funny any more.
Thanks to everyone who has voted so far, both here and via email, and for those that haven't yet ..... please spare a few minutes to vote for your top twats of the blogosphere!
ReplyDeleteGo on, you know you want to ;)
blogtwatspoll@gmail.com
grumpy old twat gets my vote. arsehole.
ReplyDeleteExcellent! Hadn't thought of that one even though the clue was in the name. Guess that's why I am twat then ;)
ReplyDeleteHow many times can I vote for Sunny Hundal?
ReplyDeleteCath Elliott is also a twat (or very nearly - she's possibly a prick - the jury's out).
Ed Balls (he of the multiple mortgages, the face only a mother could love, and the Nazi-clad, arse licking drinking binges).
Strangely he was never a member of the Bullingdon Club. Bit on the tame side for our Edward Michael.
Oh, and his campaign team for Twat Team of the Year.
Bugger. I forgot the über groupie, Gellard. I really, really want to stamp on her face.
ReplyDeleteYou are hereby authorised to put her fifth on my list (below).
3.Labour List, they are ALL a bunch of self decieving lying TWATS!
ReplyDelete4.Terry Kelly, having seen the blog the man IS a Cunt (and a fat one too)
5.Alistair Campbell, how can he not be listed?
6.Gordon Brown, liar coward and disapearance artist!
7.Nick clegg blog, for No comments ...TWAT
8.Old Holbourn, too up himself and saying nothing worth reading!
9.constantly furious, who simply fucked off...twat!
Terry Kelly's daughters blog going by the name of ...terry kelly? Twatess!!!
Red that initially as "Face sitting twat".
ReplyDeleteQuiver....
Fear not, my child. You will eventually get the chance to become a GrumpyOldCunt instead. ;)
ReplyDeleteAm I allowed to bribe people into voting the way I want them to? That is, I give them some money and they all, in turn, send in emails voting for Tim Ireland to win this festival of twattery?
ReplyDeleteUnder New Labour, the arrangement described above was called the welfare state.
Hundal's going to stroll this, or I'm no judge of a leftist fossil.
ReplyDeleteYou cunt! At least I don't have a fucking peacock obsession.
ReplyDeleteAm I allowed to nominate myself?
ReplyDelete<span>"How many times can I vote for Sunny Hundal"</span>
ReplyDeleteJust the once but there's nothing to stop yer mates voting for them ;)
'him', even (doh!)
ReplyDeleteI'll look the other way ;)
ReplyDelete*leaves room whistling a jaunty indistinguisable tune*
Well, technically yes although I'd be rather disappointed if you did ;)
ReplyDeleteIt's a shame Lard Ahmed doesn't have his own blog - I could tell 10,000 spambots to vote for him.
ReplyDeleteHere's a few for you gotty,
ReplyDeleteIan Dale : The libertarian with the iron fist. Hypocrite.
Cranmer : sanctimonious twaddle
John Redwood : Talks bollocks and does it boringly
Alistair Campbell : Boring supercilious lefty cunt
Kerry MacCarthy : Pond life
Gordon Brown : Can't believe this cunt actually has a blog!
Tax Fix : http://taxfix.co.uk/blog : "Who thought taxes could be interesting?" Actually nobody!
Labour Uncut : http://labour-uncut.co.uk : total cunts
Boris Johnson : http://www.boris-johnson.com/ : Need I explain why?
I am greatly relieved that no-one has nominated me yet - or is that tempting providence?
Don't forget that there's all the votes coming in via email too .... and although I haven't studied them in detail, I don't recall seeing you on there yet ;)
ReplyDeleteWhat exactly occurs with the peacocks then, Rab? =-O
ReplyDeleteOkay, Gotty, I've thought long and hard and my final nomination is....
ReplyDelete10) Bevanite Ellie - definitely worth a good shag if she'd just shut the fuck up!
(I tried to find that great photoshopped pic you did of her but I must have saved it in the wrong folder - so here's the boring one.)
I know the one you mean Spidey. It's an excellent one that TLOTF put together and sent in. It should be on this blog somewhere, I'll see if I can find it ;)
ReplyDeleteI know the one you mean Spidey. It's an excellent one that TLOTF put together and sent in. It should be on this blog somewhere, I'll see if I can find it ;)
ReplyDeleteYep ..... here it is .....
ReplyDeleteYou treacherous man, Spidey :-P
ReplyDeleteJust don't tell me when you do though! Or else I shall be far too preoccupied with the thought of bloggy "sloppy seconds", unless I get there first, obviously :-P (how I'd LOVE our Eleanor to read this) :-D :-D
Sorry... ;)
That's the very one..... ahhh, that's better!
ReplyDelete<span> Bloggy "sloppy seconds" it is, CS!</span> :-P <span> </span>
ReplyDeleteI love our Comment Thingy too, Bunni. 8-)
ReplyDeleteI'm not posting the full top 10, but #1 twat surely has to be Johanna Kaschke (http://jkaschke.wordpress.com/)
ReplyDeleteThis prat should definitely be included - he's top of my list:
ReplyDeletehttp://bloggerbubb.blogspot.com/
Also Iain Dale for being a toadying media whore with a tongue that's been places you wouldn't want to know about.
I haven't had much time lately but will get my top ten in before the deadline :-)
I know it's not in the UK, but the biggest twat website has to be that "organizing" site obummer the mongrel-in-chief- sends emails to the "Kenyan Fuckwad" from!
ReplyDeleteIf you take US admissions, he is all 10 and then some.
Good idea, GOT. However there is NO way that Mr Dale's poll is "right-wing". He is liberal and so are most of those who buzz around it. REAL right-wingers get little focus from that area.
ReplyDelete